Lose the Fear of Pain....

....gain the freedom of facing it.

Arterburn (2007) excerpt:

Physical pain is necessary to our functioning. It is part of God's design for our bodies because it signals there is a problem to which we should attend. Emotional pain is similar. It signals there is a problem God wants to heal. When we see emotional pain as the symptom that leads us to depend on God and turn to Him for healing, we begin to understand its purpose.

But think about the times in your life when you have grown the most. Were they during mountaintop experiences or in the lows of the valleys?

You can rely on God. He won't always protect you from horrible situations or difficult emotions, but He will always sustain and protect His children from hopelessness.

Let your emotional pain lead you to Him.

Arterburn makes a valid point: pain (physical or emotional) drives us to attend to an issue. Pain is a part of our human experience and either we embrace it and attend to the issue or we suffer a greater demise.

The best question...is your pain leading you to a greater dependence upon God or is it driving you in the opposite direction?

The moment we begin to lose the fear of pain and begin to embrace it, there is a new found freedom. It's in the process of attending where true healing can begin.

Remember, Arterburn is writing within the context of seven keys to loosing burdens....surrender was the first, acceptance is the one that covers this and the previous post. The previous post encouraged us to stop lying to ourselves and begin accepting reality. This post reminds us that pain is a normal part of life and that just like we attend to physical pain, we must also attend to emotional pain; and in so doing, freedom is the reward.

Those who sow in tears shall reap in joy. Psalm 126:5

Lose the Lies of the Past....

....gain true perspective on life.

Arterburn (2007) excerpt:

If you accept the challenge to change your life, you will have to face moments of pain from the past you might prefer be left alone, deal with relationship difficulties, and make changes in possibly all aspects of your lifestyle and habits.

Once you fully surrender the battle for change to God, you must open your eyes to reality and stop lying to yourself or making excuses.

Incredible insight concerning truth is offered by Fyodor Dostoevsky in his novel The Brothers Karamazov:

The important thing is to stop lying to yourself. A man who lies to himself, and believes his lies, becomes unable to recognize the truth, either in himself or anyone else, and he ends up losing respect for himself as well as others. When he has no respect for anyone, he can no longer love and, in order to divert himself, having no love in him, he yields to his impulses, indulges in the lowest forms of pleasure, and behaves in the end like an animal, in satisfying his vices. And it all comes from lying-- lying to others and to yourself.

The "take-away" for me as I read this chapter in Arterburn's book is the importance of laying aside delusions and attaining perspective based upon reality. A crass way of saying this is that we are prone to lie to ourselves; and, as Dostoevsky claims, there are dire consequences.

Let's bring it down to earth....For some, the lies may be that we can do things counter to good physical health and believe that we will suffer no consequences. For others, the lies may take the form of believing that no one loves us. We are all very unique beings and have very different stories. My lies are not your lies and your lies are not my lies. But what's important is that we face them squarely and seek to live our lives on truth.

If you have stuck with this post all the way to this point-- take a few more minutes and do yourself and those around you a big favor. Ask the Lord to reveal just one of your lies....think about the consequences....and commit to change your ways (or beliefs). Deal?

[By the way, if you enjoy reading this blog, share it with others. Thanks!]

Lose the Unrealistic Expectations.....

....gain real hope.
Excerpts from Arterburn (2007) What have you got to lose?:

One problem many people have with Christianity is that they are offered some false promises if they ever surrender their lives to Jesus. They are told that everything changes and happiness is the result, but this is simply not true.

Reevaluating our expectations is both necessary and an important part of accepting reality. Here are some common, unrealistic expectations to reconsider:

1. I must be perfect for God to work in me.
Holding this thought, we tend to cover up problems and be dishonest about our struggles because we think God is looking for perfection in order to work.

God sees our imperfections and is able to transform us anyway!

2. I've screwed up so many times it's just too late.
It's never too late with God.

When you accept guilt and shame from your past, you basically tell God that His sacrifice didn't matter.

[God says], "I will take your failures and build your future."

3. I can do this alone.
Perhaps this is the mother of all unrealistic expectations. God uses connections....

These first three posts all fall under the umbrella of the first key to "loosing burdens": surrender. In summary, (1) life is too burdensome trying to control everything, (2) we are unable to go it alone, and now (3) we learn that unrealistic expectations often trip us up.

Okay, I get that. But, for some reason, these things aren't sinking in. I would not for one minute claim that my life is totally surrendered to God, but at the same time I don't feel that I struggle with these truths. I mean, I know I have very little control over things....I fully accept the grace that God gives.....and I don't think that my expectations of Christianity are too out of whack. I know that God forgives me and that I don't have to be perfect for God to use me. Are you with me?

I am trying to be very honest. So, why can't I claim that my life is fully surrendered to God? How would you diagnose my condition? Come to think of it, I know very few people whose lives are fully surrendered to God. That is not a slam on my many Christian friends....this speaks more of the reality that I see. Well, how about you? How would you diagnose your aversion to a life completely surrendered to God?

Lose the Do-It-Yourself Mentality....

....gain the gift of grace.

Grace is divine, a gift from God to you. He offers new life based on nothing you have to offer. There is no way to earn his affections or coax His love for you. He already delights in you and befriends you.

Grace seems too good to be true, but it's authentic. There is no pretending. The God of all grace is compassionate. He cares deeply, and He has the capacity to be intimately involved in our lives.

Grace requires faith. We must trust in the mercy of God and realize His favor on us even though it is undeserved.

It is time you started treating yourself the way God treats you...with grace!

Now remember that we are still thinking within the framework of the first key to loosening burdens-- surrender. Yesterday we were reminded that we do not have to maintain the burdensome illusion of control and today we hear great news that we don't have to do anything to gain favor from God. Yesterday, we were challenged to gain the freedom of a life surrendered to God, today we hear that we are given unmerited favor....this thing called the "grace" of God.

Have you ever had a friend who simply loves you just because you are you; no strings attached. This is the type of friend you would never have to prove your love. Well, multiply that by infinity and you'll get a glimpse of God's unmerited favor toward you....this is grace. It comes from God and is directed to our very beings.

Lord, if this is really true, then how did my mind get so cluttered with the myth that I have to earn your favor? Change my mind so that I can fully receive your grace. Forgive me for knowing the spiritually sounding word (grace), without really experiencing the fulness of such. Thank you.

Lose the Burden of Control....

....gain the freedom of surrender.

Why not give up the illusion of control and yield to God's mercy and grace?

....since the Garden of Eden, men and women have continually played God and tried unsuccessfully to rule over their own destinies.

When we surrender, we don't just give up or play dead or wait for God to fix us. Instead, we become active participants with God in making a new path of hope....

Surrender is not passivity, nor is it resignation. Its motion requires an active and conscious turning toward God wherein we reflect our willingness to submit to His power by living out our new found truth....

Once the decision to surrender all to Christ is made, transformation begins.

(All excerpts above are from Arterburn, S. (2007, pp.10-17). What have you got to lose? Thomas Nelson: Nashville.

Let's just admit it-- maintaining the illusion of control is burdensome; there has to be a better way. I was glad to hear Arterburn's distinction regarding surrender, specifically that it is not passive. He makes it clear that surrender requires activity on our part. It requires us to simply admit that God alone is the master of the universe and that He actually doesn't need our help in this department. Allow that reality to sink in.

Lord, help me to see the folly in vainly attempting to maintain the burdensome illusion of control. Show me the freedom of a life surrendered to you.

Letting go....

Okay, enough with the mysterious "journey" post....

A good friend, Brian Mathias, gave me several copies of a book a while back and recommended that I read it and pass it along to others who may benefit. I skimmed through it and gave a few away, but, I did not take its content to heart. However, as some books do, this one has been staring me in the face, begging to be re-read, more seriously. The book?:

What Have You Got to Lose?
Experience a richer life by letting go of the things that confuse, clutter and contaminate
Author: Stepehn Arterburn
Copyright: 2007
Publisher: Thomas Nelson

Arterburn uses a framework that highlights seven "keys to losing burdens": surrender (I Peter 5:6), acceptance (Psalm 139:1), confession (James 5:16), responsibility (Galatians 6:5), forgiveness (Matthew 6:14), transformation (II Corintians 1:3-4), and preservation (II Peter 1:5).

In the coming days I will be sharing excerpts from this book. Now that you know a little more about "the journey" I hope that you are encouraged all the more to join me.

Today's assignment? Reflect on the following words of Jesus and ask yourself if you are interested in experiencing the fulfillment of these words in your life.

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.
Matthew 11:28-30

Let's go!

Anyone up for a journey?

Hello my friends,

I am contemplating a journey.....of a spiritual nature. I anticipate that it will be filled with poignant moments of freedom.

Hint: What have you got to lose? (Arterburn)

To begin the journey, simply think about the various interpretations of that question and do your best to answer it.

I would rather not go alone. Anyone in?